It all started by him sending me a picture of some sort of lightsaber dildos or something ... I don't know really cuz the link didn't work. He said he would put them up on fetlife but I never looked. I don't really care to look.
I have a thing about the dirtying of Star Wars. I don't know .. I just take my Star Wars very seriously, I guess.
But I don't like it.
I see alot of crap on tumblr, far too many selfies of pretty young thangs in the R2D2 bathing suit or naked chicks wearing Darth Vader or Stormtrooper helmets. The worst (for me) is seeing girls with FX lightsabers turned on & shoved up their twats as far as they can go.
I get it .. I do. But no thanks.
SafeD & I pretty much got in to an argument over facebook messaging yesterday. I said I don't do Sex & Star Wars .. the he proceeded to tell me how he got invited to a Star Wars themed play party but it was in Vancouver so obviously couldn't go.
I said I would never go to a play party .. especially a Star Wars themed one.
He couldn't understand my hesitation. "Alot of cosplayers are into kinky fuckery" and "kink doesn't have to be about sex"
To which I pointed out that MOST cosplayers do not do it for charity. I do.
"I have 2 kinky friends, that have Princess Leia costumes"
I don't care ... I have at least 3 friends that "troop" as Slave Leia ... it does not mean they are going to role play,or get their kink on, in them.
In the beginning of my relationship with myWolf ... I was going on a troop & He wanted me to wear my ben wa balls. When I say that, I just sort of stopped & stared at the screen for a couple of minutes.
.. first thinking .. and then choosing my words carefully.
He was disappointed & maybe a little mad at first but He got it in the end.
I did not feel comfortable, no matter how discreetly it was, introducing kink into my weird little Star Wars world. Not when I was going to be around children all day.
We deal with children .. ALOT ... we raise money for charity, mostly children's charity.
To me, it is just wrong to mix the two together.
That moment, with me scrambling, trying to make myself understood to myWolf, was sort of a defining moment. It was the first time I really had my 2 worlds clash.
I do understand that alot of geeks are into kink ... I do understand that there is alot of role playing in kink (not for me though .. just not into it).
I am weird about Star Wars. I take Star Wars very seriously. I have great passion for my trooping and my Star Wars family.
I am a freak when it comes to Star Wars & I wouldn't have it any other way.
And yes I pretty much have put Star Wars as a hard limit.
Trooping is definitely off limits.
myWolf has even been to a troop with us, albeit a very small troop but He gets it. He understands what it means to me & I am so grateful for that.
THIS is why I do what I do
As for SafeD, he is utterly clueless. The man has been in the very public side of this lifestyle for most of his life. Play parties, and multiple play partners etc etc. He can not understand why others in the lifestyle do want to do it too.
Hmmm, the other side of a narrow mind, maybe?
Anyway, it was just kinda niggling in the back of my mind all day so I thought I would share.
Happy Monday ;)
I totally get why you wouldn't mix the two. So glad Wolf gets it.
ReplyDeleteYeah, that whole role playing thing .. although I have never really tried it in the truest sense of the word .. I just can't see me every getting into it. Definately no Star Wars!
DeleteHonestly I struggled with accepting it. But it was something that didn't work for her. When something is a no..then you accept it and work on not pushing and move on to something else mutually acceptable. GK and I are very good at communicating with each other. She is my awesome sauce and in blessed. Somehow she feels the same about me.
ReplyDeleteSomehow?!?!? *giggles* ... Oh Daddy .. SOMEHOW, You manage to put up with me & all my crazy, that makes You, my Hero!!!!! *kisses*
DeleteI love the idea of Star Wars as a hard limit. I don't think it would be one of mine (actually I cannot imagine it ever coming up) but I do get it. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteF
Yes, my hard limit list is kind of weird. I actually had to put coffee on my hard limits list cuz somebody threatened to take it away once!!!
DeleteWell I get it. As you know I have a friend who crosses your path in all things Star Wars. It is a passion with him as well , and while I don't always understand what draws people to a certain passion, I understand they take them seriously.
ReplyDeleteAnd well sex and charity work do not go hand in hand! LOL.
Happy Holidays GK
willie
See Wilma, you know what I am talking about (still trying to figure out who your friend is though)
DeleteI completely understand why it's a hard limit for you. As I was reading this, I was reminded of a conversation, oh that must have been 2 years ago now, with Steve. I jokingly, very obviously jokingly in fact, mentioned using the professional grade light sabers as spanking implements.
ReplyDeleteThe joke was not well received >.> <.< >.> ^.^;
Some things are just off limits in life from kink influence. Star Wars being one of those things for you makes total sense. I'm sorry that SafeD doesn't get it, but far more glad that your Wolf does. :)
Yes Steve would know, wouldn't he! SafeD just doesn't get a whole lot of things ... he thinks because he & his wife are very public & into role play etc that EVERBODY should be.
DeleteIck! Those kind of people always make me cringe. What happened to your kink isn't my kink and that being okay? Everyone has different likes and dislikes. It's what makes people awesome!
DeleteI don't really "role play" either. I don't get it. Both in kink and vanilla settings. I tried acting in high school...nope. I even played D&D once. I blanked out most of that day, hahaha. As for kinky role play, why on earth would I want to pretend to be something else when I have to pretend most of the time in every day life? I just want to be me. :-)
That being said, I can understand why people role play, in all sorts of settings. It allows them to be something, even for a little bit, that they wouldn't otherwise get a chance to be. Which is awesome if that's someone's kink. But it's not the only kink out there.
I also have issues with people who are public but don't understand that many people need to remain private. Or claim they need to remain private yet act out of bounds in public settings.
People confuse me, as I'm sure they do for you, lol
Yeah ... I find this lifestyle is as individual as the individuals who partake. And if I have learned nothing else in the past 2 years is that you have to be true to yourself & what works & doesn't work for you.
DeleteHi -
ReplyDeleteI get the hard limit and why you keep it separate; plus I admire that you do it for charity. So which character do you dress up as?
Fairly recently discovered your blog and still catching up on all the posts.
Best,
Enzo
Hi Enzo ... thanks for reading.
DeleteI have 3 costumes (so far) .. I dress as a Jedi, a Sith Lord named Darth Traya & as seen above, the crowd favourite Ewok - "You're so FLUFFY"
3 costumes - Wow, that is great!
DeleteAgain I think it is great you do this for charity.
I wonder why people have a hard time understanding that not all our interests in life need to overlap.
I know in the case for SafeD .. he has been in the public scene for over half of his life so that's just the way he thinks. ... well that's my take on it anyway.
Delete