I have been given a task today:
"I want you to put what you are feeling right now, today ... put into words"
I have been given the choice to either blog it or email. I figure since I have subjected you all, to months of maudlin, whiny stuff that, I figured this would be a nice change of pace ....
Things have been going so well for us. We have been together for roughly 4 months now ... WOW! .. four months ... it seems like yesterday and forever, all at the same time.
We kik all day long & we skype almost every night. We don't always play & I am not always given tasks. Alot of times we just talk .. about what is going on in the moment, the future, the past, whatever. Like two "normal" human beings! O.O
Today is a heavy task day ... not heavy stuff but tasks\at regular intervals\throughout the day .. with pictures *wink wink*
It has made me reflective ... about my submission. I try to be submissive every day but really I don't know that I THINK about it every day.
Today, I am thinking about what it means to me ... being His submissive, it is what I am to write about.
I am happy .. I am schmooepey*.
Every day, we grow closer ... as a couple. And we grow closer as a Dom & sub.
I want to make Him happy .. I want to make Him proud, even if it means doing things that I am not necessarily too keen on doing. It's about pleasing Him and that makes me happy.
I am very attuned to my submissive self right now. I couldn't be happier. It almost feels like being enveloped in a warm blanket .. I feel cozy, warm & safe. And more contented and happy than I could have ever imagined.
I am loved and I love in return.
There are no outside forces pulling either of us apart (distance & time are but minor nuisances).
We are very protective of each other ... He makes sure that I am taking care of myself. He lets me be "bossy" when it comes to Him taking care of Himself as well.
I inspire Him and He plays with me.
The fact that we can talk about everything & anything is amazing too. There is such freedom in knowing that the person you are with, wants to know what you have to say ... wants to know how you are feeling .. even if it is not so good. And we are really developing excellent communication skills when misunderstandings happen .. and let face it, they will happen. But we nip in it the bud pretty quickly & move on.
I feel so free right now ... like there is nothing I can't do or I can't say. It's so amazing. I don't have to hide. There is no shame. I am me!
And the best part is that He is just as much mine as I am His ... And He makes sure I know it, every hour of every day. That is the best feeling in the world. Knowing without a shadow of a doubt that He is not going anywhere.
So I am, right now, feeling FULL ... full of Love, of submissiveness, pride, faith, joy, contentment, anticipation, wonder, awe, & schmoopiness. I am fair to burstin' !!!!
(not to mention very aroused & excitable as I have been edging every 2 hours too!!!)
We are learning and growing ... together. And there is no greater feeling in the world.
(PS .. I am VERY schmoopey right now! *giggles*)
****Schmoopey is a word I stole from my bestie .. it pretty much means all the lovey dovey romantical stuff., all rolled up into a single word. Sir Wolf likes it too *winks*