Why is that?

Why is it that when I (as a sub) am "horny" (really hate that word) & there is nobody around to take care of my needs .... do I not just want to masturbate but I want it all ... to be beaten (self inflicted but directed ouchies), plugged, clamped, stuffed with dildo to the hilt, gagged, bound AND then take my wand & go to town???? (and even then it's still not as much fun alone)

Why??? Anybody?

(yes myBatman is still around, just uber busy at the moment)

STAR WARS!!!!! (spoiler alert for those who have NOT seen the Force Awakens)

I have two Star Wars Questions!!! Yaaaay!

First from mc kitten

I'd like to know how your Star Wars trooping is going!

It's going really great. We have been so busy in the past year, we did well over 100 troops in 2015. I guess with all the hype from the Force Awakens made us even more sought after.

Me, personally, I did not do as much trooping as I would have liked. I did get to go to Star Wars Celebration (a SW only convention) in Anaheim last April. That was NUTS. But it seemed to me that I missed more troops then I went to. I am not really liking that trend. I don't know how much of that I could blame on my fibromyalgia or just laziness? I seem to be forever tired(exhausted)! The passion for trooping & all things Star Wars is still there, it's just a matter of getting my body to cooperate!

And from DelFonte

What did you think of the new Star Wars movie? 

Boy oh boy ... that's a loaded question! ha ha ... I will try to keep it brief (trust me I have had conversations on this for hours at a time).

I have seen the movie 6 times (I think it has finally left theatres now though - booooo).

The first time I saw it was at the premier. I did troop it of course. Funny story, none of my fellow troopers and I actually had tickets to go see the premier (long story there & a massive mix up), but we wouldn't miss trooping such an event anyway. But about 10 mins after the premier started the manager of the theatre rounded up 8 tickets for a lucky few of us. I was one of the "lucky" ones. So there were a couple of Jedi and a couple of stripped down (to their black underarm our ... think head to toe black spandex) ... all sitting in the front row. It was a very interesting way to view what we had all been so anxiously awaiting. We came in about 20 minutes into the movie & I do not recommend watching a 3D movie from the front row. It was a very interesting & very distorted viewing.

I can honestly say it is NOT my favourite of all the Star Wars movies. I intensely hated Kylo Ren at first ... he was quickly dubbed as EMO Ren. I thought his temper tantrums were silly. But after eventual viewings I kind of had made this back story for him. He obviously has Daddy issues ... and was too immature when he fell to the dark side. He has strength in the force but has not been properly trained & was left to run wild with it. I think he is probably relatively young as well.

All in all, it's a great movie. I absolutely LOVE Rey .. she had better turn out to be Luke's daughter or I will seriously be pissed.

I hate hate hate the whole idea of the "big weapon" .. totally unbelievable plot there.

Alot of people think it's just "A New Hope" revisited but I don't see it. Of course there is similarities but there kind of has to be ... they had to introduce new characters & incorporate what has already happened.

I love the whole "Where's Luke" vibe (think Where's Waldo)

The whole Poe/Finn being gay thing ... is (hopefully) just wishful thinking on the fans part. I really think Poe/Finn/Rey trio was really over hyped & contrived to match the Han/Luke/Leia trio. It didn't really work for me ... Poe was just not really a big enough character. I don't see the "connection" between Poe & Finn & really hope they do not try to force the whole "gay" thing just for the sake of doing the "whole gay thing" ... I thought Rey & Finn had tons of chemistry together. But then again Rey just about bonded with everybody she met.

Oh heavens ... I could ramble on for days ... I will spare you that! ;)

Suffice to say ... I did love it and am already counting down the days (and hiding from the countless rumors) to Ep  VIII

~~~~~

Thank you both for the questions!

Misty's Questions

From Misty


1. Has there been any more talk about switching? Have your feelings on the subject changed at all?

Good question!

There has been some more talking about "switch day" or as I like to call it "kittie appreciation day" but for the past couple of weeks MyBatman has been very busy & has been really ill with a nasty sinus infection. We haven't had much of a chance to play at all. He does really like the idea. It does excite us both. He thinks I would be a very evil Domme but no my feelings have not really changed on the subject. I will never like humiliation or feminizing of men. However, I am still most interested in visiting on Him some of the things He visits on me. He LOVES when I hurt myself for him BUT He does not "like pain" Himself. I am eager to do just a small fraction to Him that He does to me. He loves having me snap elastic bands on my thighs or boobs ..... so yeah, it will be a FUN day when switch day comes around.


2. If you could go on vacation anywhere where would it be?

Definitely my cottage. I have been to alot of interesting places in my career (Iceland, Norway, numerous islands in the Caribbean, to name but a few) ... but I have always come back to my cottage. There really is no place like home. Although ... winters on Maui would be divine!!! :D

3. If you could meet a celebrity (dead or alive) who would it be? 

Paul McCartney .. hands down,  Such a brilliant mind & talent. I did (last year) get to meet & acted like a total fan girl .. Mark Hamil .. twice! I have had a crush on him since 1977 so it was a definite bucket list moment.

Thanks so much for the questions Misty!!!!

Oooo!!! It's March Q&A time!

I had literally forgot about this.

I have been gone for too long!

So I am game if anybody has any questions ... shoot! :D

Never Gonna Be Anything Other Than Me

I know I know .. the title of this post is full of suggestion, but those who know me .. know I am unapologetically me.

But really that's not what I am talking about.

I am talking about the ol' switcheroonie.

It has been quite the topic of conversation for the past week.

switch ...

top...

domme ...

MEH!

I have no desire to be any of those things.

MyBatman does agree, even thinks I would be a "diabolical" top, that I don't have it in me to be a Domme.

And He is absolutely right.

I don't ... and ...

I don't ever want to.

Besides He has a Domme .. why would He ever want another? Why would I even want to be?? (I wouldn't)

BUT ...

I cannot lie, He set me to a task (we have not implemented thus far ... I am in no hurry), a task to my mind .. is insurmountable. I am doomed to never ending failure. Would I try to do it? Of course I would ... for Him.

It got me thinking though. (never a good thing) IF I were ever permitted a Switch Day .. I would call it Kittie Appreciation Day & I would visit on my good Dom the things He has me do.

Like putting an elastic band around each thigh & snapping it 10 times ... allowing Him to play with Himself if it helps ... but "you better not fucking cum"

Or taking a ruler and spanking Himself on the inner thighs ... across His ass .. under His ass ... all the while twisting His nipples as hard as He can - PURPLE NURPLES!!!!

Sticking things into places that they ought to go.

Yes .. the kittie CAN be diabolical ... well, as diabolical as her Batman is anyway.

And it would be DELIGHTFUL!!!!

But that is as far as I would go because me being me ... I like to have fun. I do like pain it is true BUT I do not like humiliation, or just plain old being mean.

MyBatman did ask me if I thought that once I had a taste of the "top" life if I would want to stay that way.

I personally know a couple of subs that this has happened to. But no, it is NOT me.

Although I have limited knowledge (what I have seen on here, tumblr & fet .. okay porn too) but I do not like Dommes ... they scare me.

 (this is VERY generally speaking I do not mean to offend) ...

It always seems to me that they are always out to prove themselves BETTER than men. Feminists gone WILD.  Men & women dig it & I am down with that .. but it's just not for me.

I have no desire to see a man dressed in any articles of women's clothing ... not panties, or nylons (I fucking hate nylons & am now made to wear them on Fridays *sighs*), bras, school girl uniforms .. whatever.

And I don't do humiliation, it's a hard limit for me.

I have spent my whole life putting myself down .. I have no wish to have somebody else bring those demons back .. nor would I intentionally do that to another person.

Nope, I am quite happy to be little sub kittie named geeky .. more little than sub (well I just like to have fun so I think I have some little qualities).

*clears throat*

So, in conclusion ... I don't want to "switch" ... I just want a "kittie appreciation day".

Luckily MyBatman knows me well enough (sometimes even
better than I think He does) and He will give me my day,  & He knows exactly what He will get. He does not like pain .. but He will hurt ... for me.

... and it will be joyous.

Switch

MyBatman is in a FemDom relationship with another. 

MyBatman is all Dom with me. 

MyBatman is an amazing Dom.

MyBatman has a very devilish imagination. 

MyBatman loves to give me self-inflicted ouchies.

MyBatman does not like pain himself.

MyBatman thinks i would be "diabolical" as a top. 

MyBatman knows that i would not do anything to Him that He hasn't done to me. 

MyBatman is more than a little excited & nervous at the thought of "switching things up" 

MyBatman should be nervous. 

*winks*

Well Now ... This is New!!!

We are back to the daily bathroom task.

When we were together before, MyBatman always gave me a task at work. 11am everyday, I would go to the private bathroom & do ... something.

This is back. The other day, the task involved a cold can of Pepsi & a "cool down" task .. I was cold for the rest of the day.

His favourite is having me snap an elastic to either my thigh or better still ... my boobs. Ouch!

... I did NOT miss the elastics.

This morning, He informs me that tomorrow I am to wear an "old pair of panties that I don't mind getting ruined"!!!!!

OH MY!

And all I got out of Him about that was,

"this week's theme is UNDER"

... & was sent off to the bathroom to slap the UNDER side of my boobs ... 10 times each with a ruler (I have a rubber ruler ... OUCH!)

....  We have themes now. Sir????

Indeed we do kittie, he replies ... " and just wait til CONDIMENT week"

WTF?????????

Sometimes They Come Back ... (at least they try)

Heh ... I forgot about this post .... It has been sitting in my drafts since .. well, for over a year .. Nov 2014

I think it's pretty funny, considering the blog post I just wrote.

But I do have to agree with this as well.

Some people are just not worth it ............... but some definitely are!

*giggles*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In my lifetime, there have been several occasions where somebody that I use to go out with/date or just fuck have come back into my life ... or tried to.

The latest is probably the worst. He didn't want me when we were together .. just ask him, he'd tell you "We were not together" ... even though ...

For the past 2 years now .. he has tried to wrangle an invitation for a visit. He lives on the east coast. Three times he has done this now.

The latest was just a couple of weeks ago.

But my question is ... why?

I obviously wasn't good enough for you to begin with so what makes you think you are good enough for me now?

You are not.

Apparently I am an "awesome" person.

I guess they should have thought of that BEFORE they dumped me huh?

And what do they expect? That I am going to jump for joy now that they do think I am worth it?

Fuck no!

You had your chance Sucka!

2016 .. Where Everything Old is New Again

I have not felt like writing in such a very long time .. I didn't really have anything to write about.

Life was good. I had my Wolf & we were very happy .. not really D/s but really happy. Or so I thought ....

Early in Sept ... I was tossed out like yesterday's trash. Literally just like that. 

September was the worse time in my life ... one catastrophic event after another. There were times I didn't think I would survive .. there were other times, when I didn't want to. 

But I did ... thankfully, I have a great support network with my friends. They were not going to let me go down. And slowly I started getting back to the things I love (Star Wars SAVED me again). 

Enough of that bullshit though. He did break me ... I will never be the same again but I am a survivor.

I have survived & I am out for fun! Fuck all that other shit. I am sick of letting myself get hurt ... 

But that being said ... weird things have happened. 

As the title suggests ... Everything old IS new again .....

In these past 3 years (GADS! It's been 3 years?!?!?!?!?!?!) since I stumbled down the rabbit hole .. there are only 2 men I have truly considered my Dom(s) ... that's right FormerD and myBatman. 

I only recently, this past May, made my peace with myBatman. It's kind of funny looking back though ... we have had very infrequent but nonetheless, did have communications with each other. I remember during the whole lockdown/terror attack in my city, He emailed me ... worried that I was in peril. I did thank Him but in the end told Him to leave me alone. I know .. what a bitch ... seriously. 

And FormerD .. we check in with each other occasionally. The last being last April when He just happened to be online at the same time as me. There has never been any ill will between us. About a year after He went back to His wife, I sent him a big email .. thanking Him for "introducing" me to the lifestyle & I told him all about my trials & tribulations after He was out of the picture. 

In my delirium of September, I was at my cottage alone when I emailed formerD .. it went something like this ....

"I am free .... if You are still interested" 

I am kinda dumb like that in my grief. (Did I mention my Grandmother died exactly one week AFTER I got so ungraciously dumped? ... like I said, HORRIBLE time in my life). 

I really could have used a good session with FormerD! He sent a quick email about a week later ... "not a good time but maybe soon" .. typical. 

I digress .... suffice it to say I have had communications with both of them in the past. 

In early, December I was Facebooking (at work as usual), when I read something that struck me as really funny & immediately made me think of myBatman ... so as joke & it had been a while ... I sent him the link. 

Much to my surprise, we are still talking today .... lots of talking, lots of horrible teasing (from both of us) ... the occasional Domming of the kittie as well. But His life is the same, & He does not that to change. I can't fault Him for that. But it is sooooooo good to have Him back in my life, in any capacity.  I would be hard pressed to lose that friendship again! It's worth fighting for. 

A couple of weeks ago (I don't know WTF was going on) .. in the space of 3 days I got 6 new messages on Fetlife. I have been pretty much inactive on Fet for the past couple of years. It's not really my thing .. at least when it comes to the locals & their scene. It felt like I was getting punked or something. I couldn't understand. Of course, all the while I was telling myBatman all about it & how odd it was that it was happening now ... He was laughing at me & saying that He would need to take a number just to be able to talk to me. Ha! Unlikely. 

In the midst of this ... who decides to pop in for a chat (online of course) ... FormerD!!!

HOLY HANNA! 

Geekie had hit the jackpot! Her two most favouritest Doms & 6 "spares" all at the same time. 

Wooo Hooo .. the Ego has landed. ha ha ha

... seriously though, it was so nice to have all that attention heaped on me all at once, for a change.

And fuck it .. I DESERVED IT! 

I was honest too (at least with my 2 Doms) .... telling Batman about FormerD & vice versa. Poor Batman must have gotten bit by abit of jealously though cuz almost immediately He went all Dom on me. That lasted for over a week & then He got slamed with work & then went away for the long weekend. But it's a new week & we are golden.

FormerD ... well, He does talk the talk but unfortunately His biggest obstacle in time .. He never has any! And I have had the added stipulation that my house is off limits for the unforeseeable future (another issue from the dreaded month of September) ... So if He wants to get together He has to give me about 24 hours notice so I can book a hotel etc. So yeah .. some day .. maybe. But whatever! 

As for the 6 strangers from Fetlife ... 3 I actually messaged back. One is a definite no .. I am just sorta, playing along with his little game, but not interested. One I haven't heard from in about 4 days ... he is a little bit too much like myBatman (He agrees too) and the third .. well we are working on setting up a coffee date in the near future. *shrug* he seems like an ok dude. But I have no expectations & really .. he would have to be pretty amazing to make me want to go down that road again. 

At least with FormerD & myBatman ... they know me & I know them. I trust them. I don't know .. it's established (I don't know how else to describe it) 

And I won't allow either of them to hurt me. (not that they would intend to, I know) 

Now if only I could roll them both in to one person made especially for me ..... *sighs*